At the road crossing

My nephew and I were returning home from shopping. We had to take a right turn. Ahead of us were a few more two wheelers. Checking both sides, we noticed a bus standing on the right side waiting for passengers to alight.. Seeing no vehicles moving on either side we decided to take the right turn. The bus driver was seeing the vehicles take the turn. But hasty that he was he did not want to stop for more time. When it was my turn to take the right turn I slowed down a bit to at the turning. I came half way through crossing the bus, when he hit my bike and my bike slid down. Luckily neither my nephew nor I was hurt, a little shaken though. As I lifted my bike I turned to the driver who fortunately stopped the bus. And he had the nerve to shift the blame all on to me. Initially I remained silent. But as he made it look like all was my fault, I retorted back.

Why did I not go fast – that was his question? While turning one usually slows down the vehicle which is what I was doing I replied. But he was not keen in accepting it and blah blah he went on.

Oh please I said, the fault is yours to keep moving the vehicle when you have seen us pass through to the right. Just please stop speaking and do not make it look like it is my fault I yelled at the driver and left in a huff.

It took me back to another incident in Delhi. My sister in law and I were returning home and just that time the driver of a mini truck behind us stopped his vehicle on the right side of the road near the road divider but decided to go straight though the signal given was red for him. And hit he did our vehicle. Wanting to support myself from falling, I used my right hand as a balance. Well my little finger and the ring finger are yet to be relieved of the pain, even though one month has already passed.

It probably is not much to bother about I suppose. But the attitude of the drivers and the way they drive the vehicles…surely makes me wonder - is there no chance of some brightness seen in the way we discipline ourselves on roads.

Careless I was...

Though the incident occurred last month….it is fresh in my memory and I know it shall be there forever.

During our stay in Delhi, my husband and I went out for an early morning walk. And so it happened on this fateful day, of course I had a lot of restrictions this time – not to sit in a park, only half hour and not more than that and so on…and
he willingly obliged and off we set for our morning walk.

Adhering to my restrictions, we were returning back home. Having entered our colony I noticed a two wheeler zip past us, something made me just tell to myself, the people in Delhi are really morning birds, out so early to start their work. How right I was. The bike made a U turn and came near us and within a few seconds, I found myself trying to call out to my husband who was few feet ahead of me. Words failed to come instantly. Finally a frantic attempt and I called out to him. He could not make out what I was telling? And at last the words stumbled out from my mouth – my chain….those guys on the bike have snatched my chain. They had already done a turn and were no longer within our vicinity. We just noticed that they wore helmets…so no recognition of anything at all – no idea, about what two wheeler they used – I thought it was a motorbike and my husband thought it was a bajaj chetak, no idea if it happened to be men or women. I just noticed that the pillion rider was wearing an orange shirt. With that information, nothing seemed bright at all. Tears streaming down, we entered our home, with my husband consoling me saying that I was indeed fortunate that they did not use anything so as to injure me in the process.

That afternoon, we had to visit a doctor. And there we noticed a group of people and a policeman had been called. Soon there arrived a jeep with three more policemen. One of the shop owner had called the police. Reason – 3 more chain snatching reported in that area. My husband took that chance to inform the police of that morning’s incident. Well it was just information to the police only – not that we expect any action whatsoever.( From what I heard, some of the police are hand in hand with the chain snatchers.) As I climbed up the stairs to return home, I found three ladies giving me a – we are of the same group smile – they were the 3 victims of that day. Smiling back, we returned home.

Well this episode could have been avoided – if and if only I had agreed to go to a nearby park and just enjoy nature, if and if only I had agreed to go for an hour’s walk rather than a half hour walk, if and if I had been on the left side of my husband giving little chance for the snatchers to get away with their booty.
And the best way to have avoided this incident was - if and only if I had paid heed to the caution given by my aunty and I had something to protect my neck.
Now I know it will be a regret that I will carry always.

Graffiti - The Hindu

I like the quotes that are published in The Hindu - Metro Plus...Graffiti
today's graffiti:

Heredity is the worst traits coming from the other parent.

Love Triangle - here and there

He was indebted to his rich childhood friend without whose help climbing the ladder of life was next to impossible. A debt which he knew he would never be able to repay.

There was this beautiful lady he was in love with. She too reciprocated his love.

One day when his friend expressed his love for this beautiful lady, he thanks God for the opportunity given to repay his debt. Off he goes with his childhood friend’s proposal to her.

When she refuses he insists saying love is nothing without sacrifice. Sacrifice what love itself is it she retorts back. He refused to listen and leaves her asking her to forget him forever.

Not willing to be another man’s wife she takes her own life away.
Friend has been listening to the conversation between these two. Not wanting to be in their way and yet not able to forget her he too kills himself.
Distraught by the death of his childhood friend and lover, he too commits suicide.
At heaven the friends meet and feel happy for each other. While hugging each other they notice her approaching them.

who is the fool?

I was just watching this serial. One person in this serial happens to be real fool or at least considered by others as fool. Another person residing in the same locality is in need of Rs.15000/- After trying all his friends, and meeting only with disappointment, he is returning home and enroute meets this so called fool. After they exchange the basic courtesy, our friend on being insisted why he looks so dejected decides there is no harm in telling his requirement and finding out if the fool can help him.

Here is how their conversation goes:
Aapke paas kuch rupye honge kya?
Kitna chahiye?
pandhrah hazaar rupye chahiye, hai kya aapke paas?
Nahi ji, mere paas tho sirf pachis hazaar rupye hain.
Oh koi baat nahin, mai kisi aur se pooch loonga…

Do you have any cash
How much do you need
I need Rs.15000, do you have it?
No, I have only Rs.25000
Oh no problem at all, I will ask someone else.

Now who is the fool here??

Unpleasantness in a showroom

There is this showroom recently opened in my locality. At my friend’s suggestion that it held a lot of varieties at reasonable rates, I thought why not give it a go. Along with my daughter I entered the textile showroom. For a new showroom it lacked the sense of neatness. Clothes were heaped on tables. Oh yes there were some on the hangers and some on the shelf too. But the tables had the most of them. Digging into the table we found a dress which we thought was looking ok. As we removed it from the pile….a sudden stench of sweat greeted our nose. The depth of stench came exactly from the dress which we felt was good in terms of pattern, design and colour. We could not continue our purchase in that showroom. It lacked neatness, cleanliness and hygiene…………..and thereby making us hurry for the exit.


But that made me ponder. Most of the showrooms have a trial room for customers to try on the dress and then go ahead to choose to buy or not. What would be the best way to avoid this unpleasantness? An unpleasantness, that makes one walk out of the shop. I think the answer lies, a lot on the customer as much as it lies on the showroom owner and salesperson.

The kids these days…

We have a kids' pool in our residential complex. Many kids enjoy splashing and playing in the water. Rainy season or weather being chill is no excuse to stop them from entering the pool. Parents, who do try to, are branded the worst parents (especially the mothers) one could ever come across because they are the biggest obstacles coming in the way of the children’s happiness and enjoyment.

This one child’s act on one day though is worth mentioning.

The guard drains the water from the pool by around 6 pm. So this day too he did the same. My neighbor saw that though the guard had opened the valve to drain the water…the water level was not receding. And all the kids were enjoying the pool with same enthusiasm. Well not all, she noticed one kid standing in a corner, his face filled with happiness to see his friends jump and splash around the water. She went up to him and asked him why he was standing aside and wondered aloud why the water was not getting drained. Giving her a look of – what you don’t know this - he replied that he was standing aside so that his feet blocked the hole where the water gets drained and that is the same reply as to why the water was not getting drained. A look of delight was very much explicit in the kid’s face.
Oh god the kids these days indeed.

MIND

Very difficult indeed it is to control the mind. It tends to tread on and adhere to exactly those memories that we don't want it to go. It plays a wonderful role in remembering and raking up those issues that we

really want to forget.

down the memory lane

Going down the memory lane
I went through my life again
Many incidents that did bring
Silent tears to my eyes
And still many did bring
A happy smile on my lips
Many a memory I did find
To last forever in mind

Life

Many different ways in life to share
Many different ways in life to care
Many different ways in life to love
Many different ways in life to live

But only when a catastrophe strikes us
That shatters us and tears us apart -
That too sometimes way too late
Do we choose to change the path.

Traffic Constable

I was walking down the road in Adyar and turned into a smaller street. Four young men on two bikes went past me. They were suddenly stopped by a traffic constable. I could not assess what wrong these four young men could have done. They were on the right side of the road. They had not entered the wrong side of a one way. They were wearing helmets. There were only two men in each bike. The speed with which they crossed me showed they were within speed limits. Then why did the traffic constable stop them. The young men were showing their licence but the traffic constable seemed not contented. The men were then seen searching their pockets. I was almost nearing them when the traffic constable lifted his head and his face showed a change. I looked in that direction and saw a beautiful young lady approach him with a beautiful smile. It was exactly the time when the boys gathered some money from their pockets and turned to hand it over to the constable. “Please sir, this is all we have.” one of the young man was saying. As this beautiful lady neared the constable, I heard him advice the boys not to over speed and also to ensure such mistakes did not happen again. And he let them go. Heaving a sigh of relief at not having been given a fine and that they did not have to part with their money, the young men left, smiling and silently thanking the beautiful young lady.
I heard the beautiful lady ask the traffic constable for some address as I continued my walking.
Wow...what difference a beautiful lady on the road could bring about!!!

Deepu's school sports day

October 1st was Deepu’s school sports day. He was rejected during the preliminaries held at school. Very upset he said it was all due to his friends’ fault who failed to keep to their track and marching the wrong way during march-past. As such he was not in any event. I told him participation was important and he had participated in most of the events and that is all that matters. On his insisting I went to attend the sports day function of Navadisha Montessori School.

As soon as he reached the stadium he asked me and his sister Anu, to sit. Saying he has to be with his other friends he just absconded. Soon the events started and I was enjoying the tiny tots in action. I was amused by one particular event. Kids from 1st standard lined up for a 50 meter race. These kids had seen others run and not knowing how far they have to run, they continued their race past the finishing line. Wow…no stop at all they just enjoyed running and were in action. The PT master had to run behind them to stop them. 50 meter race and they had already crossed 200 meter mark. Their innocence was just beautiful to see.

Ok back to my son Deepu. He came sometime later saying he was thirsty. Took the water bottle and as a passing remark he mentioned about a puppy that lay hurt and bleeding. Again zoom he vanished. Past lunch time he came to me and said he was hungry. I gave him his packet of lunch. Saying he would eat with his friends off he went again. An hour later, time to go home and Anu went in search of him. Yonder under a tree he was seen with two of his friends. Anu returned with him, and he was sulking. Why so early we have to leave was the reason behind his sulking. I looked at Anu and she shrugged saying he and his friends were busy with three puppies and its mother.

Enroute I asked him what are the events he really watched and what he really enjoyed during the sports event. He mumbled something about running race and was silent. And then he told me about his day in the field. He and his friends had spotted a puppy that was hurt in its leg and had fallen in an ant hole. With the help of an elder person they took it out and had managed to clean it. Proudly he said he was asked to be in charge of the puppies - ensuring no one tried to harm it. He had managed to give it some water. Having a little rice for himself he had offered the rest of his lunch to the puppies and their mother. The mother dog seemed to trust him and let him pat her puppies. He was even allowed to have the puppy in his lap. He and his friends had given names for the three puppies. A gleam shone in his face as he described his day.

Seeing other children compete in final events, I did long to see my son there…not to win races but to be present in the events. But as he described his day with such pride in his voice, I felt this was much better than seeing the medals and certificates which were lying for the winners. The hurt in his face as he described the puppy suffer, helping the puppy and its mother and the happiness on having done his little bit for them made me feel proud of my son. Any medal or certificate would seem very small to this act of his I felt. Hugging him and tears

of joy in my eyes…we returned home, having enjoyed a beautiful day.

To invite or not to invite

Yesterday she was telling that there is a way to invite people home or for any functions. The head of the family (it should be a man) should extend the invitations either over phone or in person. After all they expect it to be done to them so it is also necessary that they follow the same.

This conversation arose because she was not accorded a proper invitation from a relative.
Okay. I called him up and asked him to extend the invitation accordingly.
Today however she has a different view in this regard. I am sitting right beside her cousin brother and sister-in-law (SIL) and she was asking them not to extend any invitation for any functions. Her view now is since they are old and not healthy they prefer not to go out anywhere. She added that when an invitation is extended, she finds making up to the invitation an unwanted force thrust on them. She asked her SIL not to be so formal.
Oh god I though how could she tell this…..in my midst that too? Or has she forgotten what she had said to me.
Now I am lost. For my house functions do I invite or not. (oh I have this concession see, I am temporarily taking the charge of the head in my family – my husband being overseas and this concession is something that she arrived at – if the head of the family is not available immediately then the lady can take it upon herself to extend the invitation)

Awful attitude of a car driver (continuation)

Oh today his attitude was not that awful at all. He turned the car and brought it to the side where I was standing waiting for Deepu’s school van. I would not say his parking was perfect today. But at least he did not park on the centre of the road. A portion of the car was on the intersection and a portion of the car on the road side. Good I thought.

My Crow Friends

A few crows enjoy my morning breakfast and sometimes lunch too. As early as 6.30 in the morning they come to my kitchen window sill and start cawing. They are the first ones to taste my cooking (not a bad cook I am I suppose since the number has increased from one to many in the last few days). One crow in particular decided to trust me. In the sense the crow would put its head through the window grills to see if it could see something edible. Many times it sits on my window grill and now does not fly when I put out my hand through the window sill to keep something for it to eat. Once I place the food for it, it caws and ensures the others are there for their breakfast. Oh but it also ensures it is the first to have its breakfast. Most of the other crows ensure I either move out of their sight soon after I place their breakfast or at least assure that I don’t harm them or catch them.
Of late I noticed this in my crow friend – the daring one – it has got a companion for itself I suppose, they always come together. The other crow just sits a little distance away from my window sill. My friend as usual comes and caws sitting on the window sill and slowly moves itself towards the grill. As I place its breakfast, it fills its beak and goes towards its partner. Filling its partner’s beak with what it has taken, it comes again for more. I enjoy seeing this daily morning. I also talk to them, which is very amusing to my daughter who has a hearty laugh to see me do so. Hmm I sure would like to pat the crow on its head…for being so caring towards its partner and also for being daring and trusting me.

Awful attitude of the car driver

I was waiting for the school van to pick up my son. A car came up and the driver stopped the car right in the centre of the road – four streets intersect here – and was speaking on his cell phone. I thought he would move the car once his conversation is over, but no…the car stood there. Another car coming from the apartments had to horn several times for our driver friend to move his car. He backed the car for the other car to go and was back in the centre of the road again. 10 minutes passed and no sign of his moving the car. My son’s van picked him up and the van driver had to honk his horn to make the driver move his car. This time our driver friend refused to budge. I tapped on his window and requested him to park his car on the side of the road. His immediate response was…why should he move his car, was it disturbing me? Not wanting to lose my patience I told him it was as such not disturbing me but what he was doing is not right. His immediate response was - When a vehicle comes was he not backing the car. He added that he did not even let them use the horn. It is for just two minutes, when the person comes he would leave. If it is not disturbing me why do I bother, what can't I just go away like the other people on the road.
Losing my patience I replied that though his car remaining in the centre did not disturb me as such, there were two wheeler vehicles that kept honking the horn which seemed to fall deaf on his ears and yes, he did move the car, but why did he want to do it only on seeing and hearing the horn of the other car? Can he not just park it on the side of the road?
I asked him which taxi service he was operating for? He refused to reveal the information.
He was not willing to budge even a wee bit. Thinking and saying loud what a lousy driver he is and a not so good choice for the company he works for, I walked away.

Why did I just turn my back and walk my way? Why did I not ensure he moved the vehicle? Was it some fear that he would do something to me? I know I did a mistake by moving away. There were so many things I could and should have done. I could have tried further to put sense into his head. I could have noted the taxi number. I could have insisted in knowing for whom he operates. But I also knew I was going to scream at the top of my voice and just moved on. Pity I thought.

Leftovers
“Amma, shall I throw out this dish that has been lying in the fridge for the past 3 days” asked the daughter.
“No dear, don’t” replied the mother.
“Why ma?” continued the daughter. It has been lying in the fridge for past 3 days. None of us want to eat it. That apart it seems to smell a little stale.”
“That is ok. We can give it to the watchman or the maidservant tomorrow. Food is so expensive nowadays we just cannot afford to throw it away. It is a sin.” said the mother.
“But Ma, the watchman has his dinner by 8 pm. Now it is already past 9.30. Even if you give it to him, he will only use it tomorrow. And the maidservant is expected only in the late hours of the morning. By then this dish would be spoilt completely. How can they eat it?”Asked the daughter?
“There is nothing wrong in that. They are a little poor. They would never mind if the food is a little stale or old. They would gladly accept whatever we give them, needy that they are” replied the mother.
Very familiar situation and happens in most houses.

As I opened the kitchen shelves to clean, I noticed a jam bottle lying behind. Oh god I thought, not remembering about the jam available I had bought new bottles. I noticed the date. Thank god it had not expired. I took out the bottle and decided I would give it to the apartment maid. And then it just struck me, I am giving away this bottle mainly because I hesitate to use it as it is slightly older than the one I had bought recently. I just did not feel it right. Keeping the bottle in the fridge, I took out the newer one. And taking some fruits I called the maid and handed it over to her. It sure does not matter for them, how old the stock is. All that they see is an item that they find very expensive to buy has been given to them for free. And they take it happily. Manufacturing date and expiry date is something that they never bother about. But educated and literates that we are, sure know about what to use and what not to. How could we do otherwise?
My mother’s way of doing things in this regard is so different from others. The food that we have (hot and fresh) is what is offered to the maid. There were many times that my mother came to my home in the mornings and left in the evenings. These days, before leaving for my home she used to cook rice just for the maid servant.
I am not saying we should not give leftovers to others. But at least we could check and ensure that what we give is edible and not spoilt, right?

Atonement
I am punished for a mistake - a mistake that I never knew existed nor aware that I had committed. If I have done it, I do want to atone for the same and reform. That sure is not difficult.
But I also want to ensure that I don't commit the same or something similar, ever again in life. How am I supposed to go about that?

PS:This post does not relate to some mistake that I have committed. This has been a thought that has been in my mind for quite sometime now. How to correct myself from a mistake that is invisible?

Trust
Necessity to provide for his family for the present and future made him go out of his hometown to earn the living bread. Now with enough to take care of the needs for the future, he returned home.

She had been waiting for him. She had involved herself in social service activities during his absence. When he returned back to his hometown, he joined hands with her and together they dedicated their time to serving the needy. Be it orphanages, old age homes or any such institutions, they involved themselves totally. Not to forget the campaigning for blood donation. A loss of child in their life due to non availability of blood at the time of need was the reason behind their intensity in this particular activity.

Happy and loving pair they were. But life took a drastic turn when she started falling sick very frequently. Assuming it to be just exhaustion due to rigorous activity, she just ignored her health. But it kept deteriorating. Soon his health too began to show a downward slope. Sensing something amiss, they had a thorough check up and that turned to be a threatening storm in their lives. Both were tested positive for AIDS. And by then it had reached its peak. It was eating them away.But what was taking their life faster than the disease happened to be the doubts that began to crawl its way into their minds.

She had this nagging doubt on him – he had been away for quite some time – and that too at a very young age, what if the physical needs overpowered and he relented to it.
He doubted her – having been away for quite some time, she had involved herself in social work. But in the process she had made good friends with many men. What if she had given in to the need s of physical pleasure?

A happy life soon took a drastic turn. If only they had expressed their doubts to each other or at least to a common friend. Their last few days were just miserable. Writing off their hard earned wealth to charity organisations, both breathed their last. Their last few days were spent hating each other just because mind created a nasty havoc in their lives.

If only they had remembered the blood donation camp that they had assisted. The camp wherein they had fought a case against the institution for using syringes that were not disposable nor was there indication of it having been sterilised properly.
But alas, they were filled with so much suspicion against each other that they became blind to what might have happened in their life.

“We're never so vulnerable than when we trust someone - but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy” – Walter Anderson

Love

It was more than a year now since he had left his home. Bound by duty to the nation, he had to leave his newly married bride.

She remembered vividly that day. She was busy in the kitchen preparing his favorite dishes to celebrate one month of their married life. He was on the phone. A few minutes later she felt him come behind her. An act she was used to these days. From behind he hugged her. The hug seemed to tell her much more and instantly she turned to face him. Her hands around his neck she looked up and saw a sad face.
I have to report to duty in two days he said. And he had left soon after.

Their only communication was through letters. She held this letter close to her heart. He would be home this Saturday he had written. Eagerly she waited the day of his arrival. The sound of taxi near her house entrance made her run to the balcony. She felt butterflies in her heart as she him alight from the taxi and enter home. She rushed to him but stopped a feet away. Not sure how to proceed she just smiled and took the luggage from his hand. During the day he spoke to her of various things that happened during this one year at the border. She listenend intently. She sensed his happiness in being back home.

Feeling tired he excused himself after dinner and went straight to bed. Within seconds he was fast asleep. Finishing her day's work she switched off the lights and went to her room. She slid on to her side of the bed. She recalled how she used to lie in his arms, but that was a year ago she thought. Hesitantly she placed her arms across him. She removed them when he moved. As he turned towards her she saw the lovely smile that she had been missing. Snuggling close to him she went into the arms that he held open for her. Now she felt no inhibitions. In his embrace she felt peace and secure. This is where she belongs, she knew. Smiling, she drifted off to a beautiful sleep with him beside her.