My driving lessons

Sitting beside my husband and watching him steering the car with such effortless ease, I developed an instant desire to do likewise. How wonderful it would be if I could also drive so well, I thought. When I expressed my wish to my husband, he readily agreed to teach me. The very next day before he made me hold the steering wheel he taught me the ABC’s (accelerator, break, and clutch) of car driving. Only after some more theory lessons and quizzing me, he let me start the car ignition. Nervous and excited I put the gear in 1st position and pressed the accelerator. A sudden jerk and phut went the car abruptly. Baffled I turned towards my smiling husband who told me to let the clutch slowly and press the accelerator equally slowly when giving the car a start. After a few trials and testing the patience of my husband…the car started to roll. Even as I was getting instructions as to when to change the gears etc, I soon felt I had learnt it all and was happy that I could drive the car like he did when his hysterical and sudden shout brought me back to reality. He was frantically pointing to a large herd of buffaloes casually moving towards the car with reckless insouciance. Oh wow what an audience I thought for a moment. I stopped the vehicle waiting for them to pass the car and give me unrestricted space to move ahead. As we drove on we saw a man a little away walking on the middle of the road as if the entire road belonged to him. My repeated pressing of the horn had little effect on him with no indication from him to make way for the car. Seated beside me my husband told me, "The control of car is in your hands. The road ahead is not only for you but for other careless users also…make sure you don’t hit the vehicle on anybody. And if you do so, be clear that I would not be accompanying you to the police station." Newly married and not knowing whether he was serious or making a jest I gave a wide berth to the man on the road and managed to reach safely back home with the thought that there goes my dream to dust.
Few years later…an opportunity came for me to learn car driving. My friend and I found a driving school and enrolled our names there. After paying the initial deposit of Rs.1000/- each, we were thrilled when the tutor came with a tiny battered Maruti car the next day. My friend wanted to be the first to sit in the driver’s seat and we had the car moving with very little difficulty in starting it. She drove the car with no hurdle for a few kilometers and on our return I took to the wheel. I was immensely pleased when the tutor asked me if I had driven the car earlier and I was just refreshing my driving lessons.
The 2nd day was equally thrilling. More so because we found that the road was left entirely for us to enjoy and we could move without the fear of hurting anyone. My friend drove onward and I drove on return. The third day he took the same route. And this time we noticed that the petrol tank was on the verge of becoming empty. We did not enquire. But when it was the same in the following two days with the petrol level touching the red mark, we asked the tutor if we would be able to drive down both ways with the scanty petrol. He said there was no problem whatsoever and we could drive long distance with that level of petrol. This went on for five days with us picking our driving and theory lessons. On the sixth day he sent one of his drivers to teach us. This driver being smart said he would help us learn to drive a car earlier than the 22 days schedule provided we brought our own car and willing to pay him extra. Not interested to do so we declined politely. Three classes later neither our tutor nor his driver turned up. Upset at the delay in our becoming the proud owners of a driving license, all our efforts to contact him over the mobile failed. Assuming he might not be feeling well or so, we took an auto to the driving school only to find it closed. On enquiry we were shocked to know that Suvidha Driving School has been closed and the owner had left for his native place forever a few days back.
Disheartened we decided to take out our cars on alternate days and complete the lessons on our own. Luckily our husbands wholeheartedly supported the idea. So when I drove my car my friend became my tutor and when she drove the car I became her tutor. We slowly moved ahead driving around our colony and the nearby roads. When we became a little more confident we took our car to the main roads. It was just a matter of a few days before we obtained the license from the authorities.
Thrilled at having learnt most of driving by ourselves, and eagerly waiting to show my husband my driving skills, I took him in the car to the nearby Ayyapa temple. Receiving compliments from my husband, I felt I was in heaven.
I got an opportunity soon to showcase this skill of mine to my in-laws too when we drove down to Bangalore. Oh god! Was it not exciting and memorable to take to highway. And it gave me great joy when my co-sister asked me to give her driving lessons.
But not accustomed to driving car regularly, my skill seems to have slept now.
And the fact that learning to drive a car has been done without the help of a good tutor, there is some hesitancy to go ahead. So I know I need to refresh my driving skills and so am waiting for a good tutor to help me achieve the same.

Ban on smoking

Ban on smoking
So much of late has been written and spoken on the topic ever since it has been brought as a rule – Ban on smoking.
Might be we could learn a little from this village – A.Pudupatti – near Madurai, as reported in the Hindu. This village with a population of 3500 has a self-imposed ban on smoking cigarettes, beedies and tobacco, for the past 90 years. Solid 90 years of non-smoking, amazing is it not. The mention of tobacco sends people into rage. Any outsider seen smoking is gently told to go to the outskirts to satisfy the pleasure they obtain from smoking.
Well nothing is gained without loss, so it is said. The reason behind this ban happens to be a major fire that was caused when a person carelessly threw a cigarette butt on a haystack. This made the people resolve that never again would any shop in the village sell any of these products/items and neither does one find a wine shop in this village.
The village does have its proud moments when they say most of the youngsters here are non-smokers.
The question is do we have to face a calamity or disaster to strike on us, do we need our lungs to choke because of the smoking habits to resolve that we would never do this thing ever again in our lives? Which in most cases happens to be a belated one, more so because enough harm, has already been done.
It has been rightly put by Duane Alan Hahn in his quote – "When are people going to realize that breathing in smoke from anything that burns is not a good idea?"
What right do we have to knowingly cause harm to ourselves and to those around us? Each individual has to resolve that he/she would give top priority to their own health and that of others around him/her. After all of what use is this few moments of pleasure gained by putting the entire life into jeopardy which is a sure sign of dying daily.
So before we go to that extent of losing out on our lives let us fight tobacco, to ensure that we win the war against cancer."

Pleasure, which must be enjoyed at the expense of another's pain, can never be enjoyed by a worthy mind. Pleasure's couch is virtue's grave. - Augustine J. Duganne.

Listening to elders

Why is it that one finds it extremely difficult to listen to elders, who happen to be one of our near family members? Why does it not register in our minds that our people have only the very good wishes for us and whatever they say or do is for our very own good? Especially more so, when they do have the experience about good and bad.
I found myself criticizing my sister for not listening or paying heed to what has been told by our parents. She considers advises and thoughts of someone else as the best one for her when she ignores those said by her own people. And most of the time the views/opinions/thoughts/ ideas told by an outsider is exactly what has been told to her for her very own good by family member.
And realization struck me that I too am behaving in exactly the same way. I decided not to listen to an advice given by my mom while the same given by my neighbor I immediately agreed. Only to find that what my mom told was much more apt in the situation. And that is how it happens in most of the cases where we heed not to their words or advises. (I do agree good friends and some neighbors do have good will in their heart for us.)
Questions I have been asking myself:
Why do we do so? Is it because we don’t want to hurt the feelings of our neighbor or is it that we want to be in their good books? Does it not strike us that in the process of not wanting to hurt outsiders we do hurt the feelings of our dear ones? So do we find it correct to hurt our own people while trying to be in the good books of others and more so when how we lead our lives is in no way something that they would be interested in?
Parents who have given their all to ensure their offspring does not suffer in life or at least minimize the children’s suffering are pained a lot by this childish act, they hide it so as to not disappoint their loved ones. But the eyes hide not the real feelings and emotions. Why do we ignore the tears and words that the eyes say? Have we become so blind to these in our life?
When are we going to come out of the false status that we have been building around ourselves in the wrap of doing the role of being a goody goody in the eyes of outsiders.

How rightly it has been quoted:
"I have noticed that many people can admire only those who are inaccessible to them. They cannot admit or admire the genius of a person within their local community or circles. This phenomenon is even more amusing when you find that a guru or a specialist ceases to be one in their minds as soon as he/ she is accessible to them."

Friends are there for you

Friendship is a lovely gift
Never let it go adrift
Never let something to stain
For once lost you can never gain.

Give it the value it richly deserves
Ban unwanted thoughts that swerves

it has been shown - sure is friendship
Something more than just relationship

When in hours of need friends assure you
Never would they bid adieu
They would be there to erase your tear
And ensure to throw away your fear.

Rest assured you would never be alone
Never would they let you into the world unknown
They would hold your hands forever
Even after the warmth makes you abler.

Long after things grow old

The trust you place they surely would hold
A friendship so precious more than a jewel
That is something they want to be eternal

light at the end

When the world seems to turn against you
When things don't go as you expected them to
When you feel this must be the end
As you find turmoils at every bend.

Deep inside you feel not the light
Something is blocking the vision from your sight.
As you strain your eyes to see
Not a trace of anything even faintly.

All of a sudden a flash of light
Blinds your eyes, being so bright
Hands covering tightly your eyes
Out of the situation you try rise.

Open your eyes you hear someone say
Let me lead you out of this bay
Give me your hand I shall take you
And together, to problems let’s bid adieu.

night so lovely

Beautiful moon I do see
Peeping from behind the clouds
Shining little pretty stars
Adorning the vast sky
Sitting back and feeling relaxed
I love nature, its beauty I admire.

Yonder is the silhouette of trees
Bending and swaying to the gentle breeze
A lovely scene satiating our eyes
And in the silence of the night
Mild sound do I hear
Of the rivers flowing through
Crickets chirping and frogs croaking.

No musical instruments are played
None to render a song
Yet nature’s orchestra team
With its music divine to our ears
Fills our heart with inner peace.
I close my eyes and savour
The beauty of mother-nature
Happiness filling my heart to brim
And I truly wish and pray
This night would never end.

Then I hear night whispering to me
Sorry dear I have to leave
Across the globe I do have
Others also to please
But I promise to return by dusk
And fill you with happiness again.
Slowly the stillness of the night
Paves the way for sun to arise.
Elegant and majestic sun shows its face
And begins the day with joy and grace.

With lots of love

Brought into this lovely earth
We know not what lies ahead
But pray please do pay heed
When told, never succumb to greed.

As we move and learn to live
To meet our demands, we do strive
In the process we meet people so true
Whose heart is so, beautiful and pure.

A relationship that lends us a shoulder
When life seems like pushing a boulder
God sent angels we call them friends
With them around we forget the bends

In friendship do you seek wealth and gold
Then stand back and do not hold
For friendship is such a priceless treasure
So precious, nothing can equal its measure.

Night time vehicle users - Use your dippers please

Travelling by road during night is probably the worst nightmare one could ever go through. Riding my two-wheeler during night, I notice vehicles coming in the opposite direction speeding down the road with their headlights on in high beam. (This blinds the vehicle users and pedestrians coming in the opposite direction for a few minutes. Total black out one could say. A sort of panic or tension is created when visibility is next to nothing for those few moments.) I have tried indicating to them that the headlights are in high beam position and can be dipped for better vision for the other vehicles by alternating my lights from dipper to high beam and back to dipper again. The sad point is most of them neither acknowledge, having seen me alternating my headlights nor do they change to dipper position. They just speed past and in that fraction of a second all that I see ahead is total darkness. I have to strain my eyes for a few moments before I can see ahead clearly.

Same, is the case of vehicles coming behind with lights on high beam. The lights seen in the rear view mirror is equally glaring for the vehicle user, this in turn ensures the rider/driver of the vehicle (going ahead) has no clear sight of what is coming behind him.

I have also come across drivers of heavy vehicles and cars who probably feel they would save on their battery life if they don’t switch on the lights during night. They feel streetlight helps in seeing the way so why waste their vehicle’s battery life. And there are some very smart drivers of heavy vehicle who manage to keep just one of their headlights on in high beam. And vehicles coming in the opposite direction are lucky if the lights or on the right side of the oncoming vehicle. If it is on the left side and with the high beam lights glaring and blinding the eyes…it sure looks like an invitation from high above saying "Welcome home dear".

Some accidents occurring in the night could be averted to a large extent if the vehicle users just use their mind a little and switch their lights from high beam to dippers when they see a vehicle approaching.

An earnest request to vehicle users – Let not the high beam headlights that you use for your own convenience and sometimes due to negligence be the reason to create darkness in some lives.

Time and Tide waits for no one

Seeing him walking up and down the room
Sit down with me please she requested
An argument erupted and he did fume
Brushing aside the tears, her chores she attended.

Let's go for a walk, she asked of him
Not now dear am too tired, he replied.
She knew his tensions were up to the brim
Smiling away the disappointment, she stepped aside.

Ready for a drive, she put forth her desire -
Have a meeting he said matter a bit crucial.
Not wishing to further enquire
Into her kitchen she did hustle.

Let's take a long ride she pleaded
Not now dear, put aside your pleasure
Kids needs are first to be acceded
Postpone your desire for the future.

Spare a few minutes and let me be thine
To this request, let kids settle in life he said
Oh god what a selfish desire of mine
Guilt overwhelming, her heart did bled

Sit with me dear, he requested
Holding his hands she did as told.
Sitting with him was what she wanted
Worth it was much more than gold.

He once requested for a stroll
Anything for you she did remark
She needed no words of cajole
Together they went to a park.

Set aside some time for me he said
All my time, she said, is at your disposal
Being with him was what she wanted
Moments for which anything she'd cancel.

Sitting in the verandah beside him
Her fingers clasping, deep in bliss
Looking up at him she smiled in the dim
A smile before he happened to miss

As he felt her fingers loosen slowly
All that he could see in her place
When tears blinded him like a curtain
Was a silhouette of her lovely face.

Leave me not, he put forth his request
And he woke up from his reverie
Her absence he could not digest
And his life he felt was dumpy.

Tears whelming again he recollected
Her words, never again to be heard
"When the time really comes my dear
For all you know, I might not be near.

Random thoughts

1. However rich in terms of money
a man in this earth happens to be
the oxygen he needs to breathe
is god's gift to him for free.

2. Smile - lights up the face
gives the owner a lovely grace
it keeps the frowns away
ensures tears are at bay
provides a life filled with cheer
for what else are we for here.

3. When things go wrong as they should'nt
when life seems difficult to sail in rough weather
when everything seems so bleak and thinner
when you feel you can go no further
think of and keep faith on the one in the altar
who is here to see you through thick and thin
for he who created the night
ensured sunshine is not far away.


4. Warm morning wishes sent your way
to wish you have the very best day
Smile and laugh and keep cheery
live life today and be merry


5. Wishes adorned and sent with a smile
Are so sweet and worthwhile
To the sender it adds a grace
While the receiver's worries it does erase.